Summer Pool Party Invitation

Evan Michael McIntyre
Aug 11
3 min read

🌞💦 "I am your glitter-faced DJ for the ultimate summer pool party! Broadcasting live from the deep end with waterproof beats and disco dreams!" 🎧💃

DJ Evan from Heaven – 777

Straight from the skies with beats that bless.

Jesus died on the cross so you can be relieved of the burden of being a sinner. It is natural to sin... you are human. I sin a hundred times a day, but every night I pray to Jesus and ask him to make me a better man and sin less. He knows I am human and will sin again, and that is okay. I just do my best. He died on the cross—he took on the pain of your sins so you don't have to worry. Have fun.

First, of course, do no harm. Then, above all, God wants you to have fun. Stay sober and do proper nutrition and exercise, of course. How can you heal the world if you are a mess? God helps those who help themselves. You are a star in the making... and you will heal the world by showing people they are loved. The world is starving for that. That is your calling. Everything happens for a reason. You are reading this for a reason. God is speaking through me to you.

You now have a mission—a purpose—to heal broken hearts. But you must heal yourself too. God helps those who help themselves. So exercise, proper nutrition, yoga, meditation, prayer, qigong. Hit the gym so you are attractive to others and be the star you were meant to be—and take a message of ONLY LOVE to the world.

Remember: “He who is without sin, cast the first stone.” Judge not, lest ye be judged. Make sure your porch—your side of the street—is clean before judging others. And for God’s sake, don’t be a bossy Karen. And men can be Karens too. Even my own mom knew better than to tell me what to do.

So like I said, it all happens for a reason and you are meant to hear this from Jesus and God. You will always be okay. Guardian angels—right here on earth—including me, a very powerful Free Bird King of the Scottish Rite Masons, told you that you were reading this for a reason... because you graduated to a higher level of human being—a heaven-bound Free Mason.

Welcome to the club.

If you are reading this, I don’t want to scare you... but you have been chosen. Stand by for more info in my blogs. Yes—you, through the magic of druid Sith technology and the best intel in the world—Scottish Rite Masons inviting you in.

God loves you. Jesus wants—above all—for you to be healthy and sober, so you can take a message of LOVE to those in need... especially our homeless veterans.

Semper Fi.

Live Free or Die.

In the words of Winston Churchill:

Never give up.

Climb every mountain, young Anakin and Princess Leias.

Follow ClubEvan.com

@DJClubEvan on the new Tumblr, Instagram, OnlyFans (where I DJ shirtless and in jockstrap for 18+),

🎶 Listen to the best music playlists on the planet at @DJClubEvan on YouTube Music—

Where you’ll hear bands that I discovered like Metallica and Sir Mix-a-Lot

📩 To do business: linkedin.com/in/clubevan

🔥 Whenever I see a beautiful woman or a handsome man walk by … I don't just stare — I SING IT! 🎤"Wheeeere do you gooooo… my lovely?" 🎶

💘 Because love is in the air, sunscreen is on thick, and the only thing hotter than the sun is the person dancing next to you.